thank.You

Cliff has been inadvertently teaching me about thankfulness. Everyday his thankfulness abounds. Whatever we are talking about always comes with an attitude of gratefulness. It’s amazing.

Oh, I’m a thankful person. I’m full of gratitude, except there’s always a stipulation. “This is great, but….”, or “Wow, that’s wonderful, but just…”, you know? It’s just not quite good enough.

I think basically it comes from how I am with myself. I’m just ‘not quite there yet’, or overall ‘not good enough at just about, well, everything’. As hard has it must be to live with me because of that, it’s even worse *being* me. I’m just never totally satisfied.

Everything is good enough for Cliff. He sees everything through the providential hand of God. Everything happens for a reason and everything is good, perfect and pleasing. Sure, things need to be worked through and developed, because he strives for excellence, but in the meantime, it’s all good. You know what’s *all good*? My husband. Yeah he’s all good; he’s teaching me about thankfulness. Because God has taught him. And as Cliff leads our home, he is teaching all of us what God has done in and through his life.

So, last week I started thanking God for things throughout the day, writing them down, saying them out-loud, but stopping before the ‘but….’. See, I am genuinely grateful, but as soon as the gratefulness is thought, there is this other thing that pops up that tries to steal it away.

So, this past week, I’ve stopped AT the “thank-You’s” not AFTER the ‘but’. I never realized how many things I have to be thankful for and how aware I actually am of how amazing my life is. How wonderful my family is. How perfect and pleasing my relationships are. How blessed we are to have the church family we have and the love of so many people. How beautiful my home is and how outstanding my children are. The list hasn’t stopped.

These are things I am [and have been] actually feeling and thinking everyday, but I only think them and as soon as the big “but” comes along, those moments are robbed from me.

I will endeavor to be thankful without stipulation. I don’t need to clarity to myself or anyone else that “as perfect as something is”, it could be somehow better ‘if’.

Being a perfectionist is not all it’s cracked up to be (ask my family, geesh). *But* I’m releasing that to God. He knows my heart. I desire to do my Father’s will. I live for Him. I’m not perfect, but I’m also righteous in Christ and I live my life each day pursing holiness and peace as God’s grace allows.

So, I’m a thankful girl today and my thankfulness is a part of my worship. It’s something I’m offering to God because I so desperately want Him to know I see what He is doing, what He has done and I am expectant for all the things He is going to do.

Ephesians 5:29-20;
Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.